Diogenes and Plato

One day, observing Plato eating olives at a costly banquet…

“How is it”, he noted, “that you, a philosopher who sailed to Sicily for the sake of these delicacies, now, when they are in front of you, do not seem to enjoy them”?

“By the gods”, replied Plato, “there also for the most part I lived on olives and other things”.

“Why then”, said Diogenes, “did you have to go to Syracuse? Was is that Attica did not grow olives at that time”?

he was eating dried Figs…..

when he encountered Plato and offered him a share of them. When Plato took and ate them, Diogenes remarked, “ I said that you might share them, not that you should eat all of them”.

When Plato invited Diogenes to his house……

Diogenes entered the house and trampling on the carpets said, “I trample upon Plato’s vainglory,” to witch Plato replied, “How much pride, Diogenes, you expose to view by7 pretending not to be proud!!”

Others tell us that what Diogenes said was, “I trample upon the pride of Plato.” To witch Plato retorted, “Yes, Diogenes, with another kind of pride”

Diogenes asked Plato for wine and for some dried figs…

Plato send him a whole jar of wine….

“If someone asks you how many two and tow make, will you answer,” asked Diogenes, “twenty? So, it eems that you neither give what you are asked nor answer as you are questioned”

Thus he scoffed at him as one who talked without end.

When Plato called him a dog….Diogenes replied

Quite true, for I come back over and over again to those who have sold me.”

When Plato defined man as a biped and featherless animal…..

Diogenes plucked a chicken and brought it into the lecture hall, saying,

“Behold Plato’s man!”

When Plato saw him washing lettuces…

He approached him and quietly said to him, “If you had paid your respects to Dionysius, you would not be washing lettuces mow”, to witch equal calmness Diogenes replied, “If you had washed lettuces, Plato, you would not have had to pay your respects to Dionysius”.
 King Biscuit Man